Terra Out Loud

19 09, 2013

Bullying is reaching it’s tipping point

By |September 19th, 2013|Terra Out Loud|



So, I know we all have had our fair share of feeling pushed around at some point in our lives.  Whether it was all-out bullying at school, a family member or partner taking their frustrations out on you, a boss being aggressive or mean to you, or even some random person on the street yelling at you for driving too slow… we have all felt hurt by another persons actions.  This blog is about that.  It is time for a change, and I believe that bullying is reaching it’s tipping point.  We can make the change right now!

I only recently figured out that I had been bullied by a family member when I was a young person. It didn’t sink in until I was experiencing something similar with an acquaintance recently, and I finally realized, “It is not okay for another person to treat me this way”.  When I was a teen, I had held in all of the pain and hurt from the childhood bully and stuffed it deep down and I became the “Defender of the underdog!”  I took it upon myself to protect anyone who was being treated poorly, (Sometimes, EVEN if they were in the wrong!!) 🙂 This led to many bad relationships, friendships and situations where I was extremely co-dependent to people.  I could not have known then that I was taking care of the young person inside of me who didn’t feel supported or defended many years prior.  The problem was, I really couldn’t see the mean stuff that people did as “bad” or “wrong”.  I still have the tendency to trust first and ask questions later (which I will honestly say is a great and beautiful trait to have, yet, it can lead to not noticing when someone is taking advantage of you) and I have learned over the years to listen more deeply to my intuition. If it feels “strange, wrong, bad, or uncomfortable”, it probably is.

I write all of that because I want to be sure that anyone who decides to read this understands that I truly and deeply understand the concept of bullying, emotional abuse, and even mental, physical and sexual abuse due to my childhood willingness to take it upon myself to be strong and not ask for help.

I want to say right now,




You deserve to be treated with kindness, with love, and with support from the people in your life.  And if there is something that is happening in your life that is painful, mean, abusive, unkind, aggressive, or ANYthing that hurts you, it is up to you to change it!! TELL PEOPLE ABOUT IT!  This is the time when tattling is OKAY, necessary even!!!  You are not bad or wrong or stupid or weak or childish or a freak or anything that you might be thinking in your mind if you talk to someone about the pain and suffering and hurt in your life.  If you do not feel you can talk to or be supported by your partner, best friend, or parent, than talk to a teacher, a co-worker, a counselor, a Spiritual Practitioner or clergy person.  You will not be a bad person to get the support and love you need and deserve!  You will be a COURAGEOUS and STRONG person to do that!

Why am I writing about this right now? Because I feel there is a voice that is crying out to be heard.  A voice of kind and giving, caring and forgiving people out there who don’t know how to stop the bullying and abuse!  Within the past two weeks, I have heard more than half a dozen young people tell me about being bullied in school.  I have talked to or heard from several adults recently who were abused and/or bullied as children and never told anyone, who are only JUST NOW starting to deal with the pain they have carried with them throughout their lives… Many times, this kind of pain will show up as Disease of some kind or another… Cancer, physical pain, emotional breakdowns, panic attacks, anxiety, depression, can be linked to the stress that occurs when not dealing with something in the past that was painful or harmful.

We all deserve love.  We all deserve support.  If we don’t reach out, than not only do we suffer, but the people we care so much about and are trying to protect from our pain will also suffer! The people who love us KNOW when something is wrong.  And if we don’t talk about it, now two or more people are walking around feeling bad and not knowing why or what can be done to shift the negative energy.

Say to yourself, "I am the center point of my reality. Only love fills my life. I love myself, therefor, I only allow loving people into my life."

Say to yourself, “I am the center point of my reality. Only love fills my life. I love myself, therefor, I only allow loving people into my life.”

This blog is a plea to ANYone who is suffering from the hands or words of another.  It is not your fault they are taking their hurt and anger out on you, but it IS your fault if you don’t do something about it.  DO NOT LET PEOPLE TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU! PLEASE talk to someone!  Get the help you need and deserve! If the first person doesn’t help you, talk to someone else.  It is up to you to be responsible for your experiences in your life, and often, asking for help is one way to be truly and courageously responsible!  When you do it and someone else sees how courageous you were, it might even help THEM get the help THEY need and deserve!

We are all in this together people! We must teach people how to treat us.  If you are feeling abused or hurt or bullied, do not be a victim of this energy!  It is up to you to show yourself and the world that you deserve kindness, love and  support.  I know I can’t force anyone who is struggling or suffering to get help and support.  But I can write a blog that may support one of you reading it to make a change that will forever shift your life.  This is my dream… That everyone is treated kindly and lovingly.  It starts with you and me.  We must be kind, and we must only allow kindness into our lives.  I believe this is one of the best ways that we will create PEACE ON EARTH!

OH! and as a side-note, I’m also wondering if people allow themselves to be pushed around or bullied because they think it is the only way they will get attention?  If this is the case, and you are one of those people, that is completely untrue! People do not want to hang around someone who is constantly suffering and in pain.  People can’t fix what you are not willing to fix yourself.  You will have more friends and positive influences in your life if you simply allow yourself to be supported!  Do not create more drama just to be heard.  The only way you can truly be heard is if you are honest and authentic!

And one more side-note, YOU are responsible for your joy and happiness. No one else can give it to you. So if you think that by suffering or being a victim, you will create someone into your life to take care of you, eventually you will resent that person and create someone else to take care of you.  Nobody else can care for you if you are not willing to care for yourself! (And if you want to read some great books that can help you understand those concepts better, read The Four Agreements, The Language of Love, and The Voice of Knowledge by Don Miguel Ruiz.)


27 08, 2013

Miley, twerking, Divine Feminine, and the voice of the youth

By |August 27th, 2013|Terra Out Loud|

So, with all of this talk about Miley Cyrus, twerking and feminism, I have become really aware of a voice that is not being heard.

Many will claim it is the Divine Feminine which will guide the way to our true freedom, many will say it is the Divine Masculine that will push forth or lift up the Divine Feminine, and many will say they don’t even care.  What I say is, the voice of the young people today are SCREAMING OUT for someone to listen, and I say we start listening!  I have a lot to say on this subject because I spend a LOT of time with lots of young people in various situations.  I am a teen advisor at my Spiritual Center, I go to summer camps with them, I have 4 teenaged children, I spend a lot of time with my friends children, and I love to simply BE with them and listen to what they have to say while trying to not have a judgment or speak my perspectives without permission from them.  I notice that often, I may have an immediate reaction or opinion about something they might say or do. Yet, I also notice that when I truly LISTEN, I will hear what is being asked for or spoken on a deeper level… And (I believe) what is being said or asked for has been what we have ALL as young people been trying to say or ask for for all of time! I will come back to this thought after some rambling…

So often, ‘grown ups’ (GU) will witness ‘young people’ (YP) playing or fighting or twerking or whatever, and the ‘GU’ will discuss with other ‘GUs’ their perspectives, their opinions, their disgust, their fears, and their thoughts without even talking to the ‘YP’.  Then, often, the ‘GU’ will later tell the ‘YP’ what they thought of their actions, but not ever ask the ‘YP’ what was going on, and what their thoughts were about the actions that were taken.  Or if they DO ask the ‘YP’ their thoughts or perspectives, the GU will talk about their perspectives, their disgust, their opinions, and their perspectives without truly HEARING what the ‘YP’ were actually saying underneath the words!

I know a LOT of amazing parents, grandparents, teachers, and others who work with the youth, (including myself) so, don’t get me wrong, I know ‘GUs’ are always doing the best that they can at any given time, YET…. I have a theory… what if the problem with our world today is that people don’t actually listen to the youth??!?  Take that in for a second… I remember what it was like being a kid and not feeling heard by my parents (Who are BTW two of the most amazing people and parents this planet has ever seen) even though they were listening to me the best way they knew how… Who reading this ever felt demeaned or unheard by some grown up in their childhood (or even now for that matter!)?  Who among us ever had the thought, “Why don’t they understand me?” or, “When will they just hear what I am saying?” or, “Grown ups are stupid, they will never get me”, or some other such thought?

The more I think about this stuff, the more I think, what if the Bible was right?!?! What if it IS the children who will lead us??  What if this whole conversation about the Divine Masculine and the Divine Feminine and ‘those crazy youths’ is all simply the first step to realizing that all it will take is the masculine and the feminine coming together to create the child?!  I wonder if it’s THEN that we will remember our truth??  What if talking about masculine and feminine is still very much about separation?  What about the union of the two parts?  AND, what if we listen to our youth MORE, and tell them how or who to be LESS?  Could that be the key to end all suffering?  I think it might be the start!

So, I know I am ranting here a little bit, I’m curious, what do you think about about the “youth of today”?  I’m going to get back to what I was saying at the end of the first paragraph. What if the youth are simply saying exactly what we were ALL trying to say when we were their age?  What if EVERY new generation, once they hit the ripe age of puberty and start moving into their Saturn Return (Age 28-ish) are given the gift of insight without the gift of how to communicate that insight in words?  What if we as teens and young adults are allowed to communicate the deeper knowing of who WE (As a human body) are only through the creativity of our actions?  Maybe that would look something like break-dancing, or bumping and grinding, or flapper dancing, or doing the dougie, or twerking, or pole dancing, or  radical art and music, or skateboarding, or video gaming, or WHATEVER we could come up with to give voice to our generation!  Maybe, just maybe, the youth are actually telling us something, and we are simply judging it and putting it down without hearing the deeper meaning of what is trying to come forth through their gifts and talents (crazy and over sexed as they may seem).

Consider the ramblings of this author/performer and try listening to what is trying to be heard through the actions and words of the young people.  I know I am no longer a kid, and yet, I feel I may have a bit of an advantage that many parents don’t have.  I still remember REALLY WELL what it was like to be a teenager and young adult and not feel heard or seen.  I have not given birth to children, and yet, I get to spend a lot of time with many age groups and learn from them.  Maybe this is another advantage I have.  I don’t get as personally charged as parents do to their children’s “insanity”, (Don’t get me wrong, I do get charged, I just don’t get as personally charged about ‘my child’ acting a certain way) and often, I can really see things from the child’s perspective.

Try twerking or doing the dougie or some other teen crazed thing with a group of kids. Go watch the One Direction movie and observe how the kids are reacting, and what they are reacting to.  Remember what it was like to be a teenager or young adult, and try listening to the young people with an open mind and heart.  They may have something to teach us that could actually change the world.  They are quite brilliant when you give them the chance to be!

I implore you to consider the possibility that a child might lead us to our deeper awareness of Oneness…. and we are missing the point when we stop listening and try to make them “better people” from our old ways.

Terra rant, OUT!

13 08, 2013

Beloved, a special Festival!!

By |August 13th, 2013|Terra Out Loud|

Have you ever been to a weekend long music festival where you camp out and see musicians, connect with people, eat festival food, and don’t get enough sleep??  If not, I HIGHLY recommend it!! Especially if you get a chance to go to the Beloved Music Festival in Tidewater Falls, OR.  WOW! Such intention, such deep reverence for Mother Earth, such GREAT intentional music and art!  Great food, open minded people, crystals, clothing, tea ceremonies, naked people (at least one or two!), new friends, friends you haven’t seen in a while… seriously, I can’t think of a better way to spend a weekend in August!!!  I love my life so much, and I am so blessed to notice and recognize all of the many ways I am supported and loved!

Michael (my Beloved partner) and I went to the Beloved Sacred Arts and Music Festival this year (last year was our first time, and we decided to volunteer this year) and we had so much fun! Nahko and Medicine for the People opened the weekend with SUCH an awesome set!!  And the music during the rest of the weekend was so beautiful, heart opening, get-on-your-feet-and-dance worthy!!!

We arrived Thursday afternoon just in time for our first volunteer slot. We jumped out of our car and jumped right into parking cars! 🙂 They man in charge of our time slot gave me a chance to run and grab some things our of our car so I could claim a tent spot (so gracious!!) and when our time was over for that day, we pitched our tent in the dark and then found some food (seriously, the best festival food on the planet with Lydia’s, Get Fried Rice, Eva’s Herbucha, Coconut Bliss, and several others), then went to bed.

Friday morning, we woke up to rain (so awesome to hear and feel rain on your tent!) and once it stopped, we got up and wandered around to find some friends and get some food. I had a Raw Power Shake from Lydia’s. (my favorite vendor there!) We sat with our friends and listened to Karnamrita perform Kirtan. She talked about beautiful chants and phrases, then sang them… I learned that Ari puricham (Not sure of spelling) means the seed, the beginning (I call it the Flower of Life), and Bajami means I worship with my voice. (A Perfect phrase for me to learn!)

After that, Nahko and Medicine for the People completely blew out minds with their incredible energy, beautiful music, amazing hearts, and FULL smiles! 🙂 Even though I was a fan of theirs before seeing them live, I fell completely in love with them in that moment!!

Michael got henna on his head! He has no tattoos, and since I have several, it was really fun to watch his process of choosing what he would get and where to put them.  He got an Ohm symbol above his right ear, and a yin yang symbol above his left ear. He’s even considering getting an actual tattoo now!

We experienced so much LOVE from people’s hearts! So many people hugging each other for more than a second… sometimes, even I started to pull away sooner than was necessary! And I love to hug! People just wanted to appreciate and honor and love each other!  I kept looking around and watching people doing yoga, hugging each other, dancing, and enjoying life together.  I got dripped on by a tree while I sat and wrote in my journal… It just made me remember to be present to my life.  Beautiful people, beautiful energy, beautiful presence, and lifting each other and Mama Earth up!  As Karmarita put it, “Creating medicine together”.  That is exactly what I experienced while tears of pure joy and gratitude ran down my face.

As a side note, Michael and I are both clean and clear of drugs, and I haven’t had a drink of alcohol in many many years.  Even though there was no alcohol at the festival, there was plenty of other mind-mood altering substances being used.  Since it has been such a long time since I have imbibed or spent time with those who do, I was able to use this opportunity to witness people using the drugs to help them open up to each other in ways our society often rejects. It made me a little bit sad to realize that it takes some people becoming altered by substances to open up, while at the same time making me happy that people were able to open up so much… especially with each other!! It is my dream to experience a world where people do not need mind-mood altering substances to open their hearts and minds and share in a love-fest of hugging, dancing, and loving each other openly.  A world where we can just simply love each other and share our lives in a deep, authentic, real, and present way ALL of the time.

While I am on the Love-fest vibe, the port-o-potties had poems and quotes in them!!! 🙂 It was so awesome to go into one of the many potties and see herbs hanging in them, and when you sat down, there was a different poem or quote in each one… Many by Hafiz, Rumi, and other love poets… One that I remembered to write down was, “Loves greatest gift is the ability to make everything it touches sacred” ~Rumi.  Honestly, where else can you experience a festival where the port-o-potties support a heart opening moment like that?!?!

On Saturday morning, we had our second volunteer shift parking cars, and it was really slow. We were at the box office, and there were about 20 cars that went through. We had to miss some of the performances, and I was the most sad to miss Donna De Lory.  Once our shift was over (it was so cold and wet!) We had to get some warm food in our bodies. So we stood in line and started talking to a beautiful woman all in white. Suddenly, we realized it was Donna!  How serendipitous, right?!?!  We got to talk to her for a while, and Michael even talked to her about Luminary Voices (His new company) and getting her and Luminaries and Medicine for the People to perform a concert in Portland!  (Have I mentioned how much I love my life and all of the amazing was in which I am supported?!?! Well, I DO!!!)

And I must give a shout out to the people who worked the whole festival and helped make the experience safe, beautiful, and welcoming to all people… Including LOTS of kids!! The security officers, the vendors, the people who volunteered, the people who led the volunteer shifts, the artists, the musicians, the photographers, sound crew, the light crew, the people who created and built the stage, the people who set up before everyone arrived, the people who cleaned up after everyone left, and the fire keepers… Deep, heart-felt gratitude, love and light to all!!

Thank you Beloved Sacred Art and music Festival! I am so grateful for my experience!!!

6 08, 2013

SO many steps to publishing a book!

By |August 6th, 2013|Terra Out Loud|

I’m becoming (Well, actually, HAVE BEEN for some time) aware of the MANY steps it takes to write and publish your own book!  I can certainly tell you that once I am finished with this first book, I will feel SO CLEAR about how to do it with the next one! It has taken me about 2 years since I wrote The Butterfly Process to find and hire an editor, a cover design artist, an interior designer, a marketing person/group, a social media person, a booking agent,  a web designer…. And ALL of the tiny little things in between!  And in the meantime, I am doing most of my own marketing, working on my website in my spare time, talking to all of the people involved, keeping it all straight in my mind, and following through on every teeny little thing that comes up… It could make a right brained person crazy!! LOL! (Luckily, I have a good bit of my dad’s left brain abilities too… PLUS, the most amazing Beloved/partner/support person in the world!! Thank you Michael Doss!)

Now that I am nearing the end of this process and will have a printed book in my hands within the next few weeks, I am getting SO clear as to how much I have done in the past two years to breathe life into my first book! WOW!  Once I am complete with this first one and in the process of writing my next book(s), I also plan to start mentoring authors who wish to go through this same process! It seems it would be such a waste of my knowledge and awareness not to do SOMETHING  to give back to my community!!

Anyone who is truly serious about writing and publishing a book, PLEASE understand that unless you have all of the steps laid out for you, it might take some time and energy 🙂  Truly! And, I will say, in the end it is definitely worth it! Because now, I have a skill set, and I am so clear for my following books!!

I actually look forward to witnessing and experiencing the path(s) that present(s) itself with the next book(s)… After seeing how much I have learned about myself, and grown through this first book, I can only imagine the growth opportunities that will present themselves in the future! Here’s to many more books, publishing processes, connections, joy and expansion!!! YEEHAW!

31 07, 2013

The Butterfly Process, a process in itself….

By |July 31st, 2013|Terra Out Loud|

Hi all!

This is my stream of thought, very first Blog on my Terra Out Loud blog site!!  Please forgive an errors, and typos, and any disjointed thoughts you may encounter here.  I truly write from my stream of thoughts, and I LOVE to look back and re-read what I write, because sometimes, the most interesting and amazing insights show up!  I have been journaling since I was 10 years old, and I have learned that editing as you go can really slow down the process of the thoughts that want to show up 🙂 So, WELCOME to my blog, Terra Out Loud!! I’m glad you dropped by!!

So, I have been working on publishing my book, The Butterfly Process, Tools for Transformation for some time now… Since I am self publishing, I have chosen to learn the in’s and out’s of what it takes to produce, edit, publish and market a book… And I will say right now, It’s SO much work!  And, I might add, it’s SO well worth it!!!

I feel really good about the finished product, which will be coming out in print around the end of September.  I am doing the final touches on it with my interior designer, and will be able to send it to the printer and get my proof within the next week or two!!  This is a cathartic moment for me, as I really had no idea when I started writing this book that it would 1) take so long to get printed, 2) that I would learn so much about myself and the publishing process, and 3) that I would enjoy it as much as I have!!!

I am so very excited to be so close to the end of this part of my journey (having a book that I wrote in my hands, and ready for marketing) and I just have to say, WOW!  I am so grateful to everyone who has been a part of this process!!! I am grateful to myself too! I have moved through, allowed, and let go of so many things that do not serve my life, and I had no idea they even existed!

One thing I have discovered that has made the most impact to me is that, whatever you decide to call your book, (or album, or project, etc) be prepared to live that title as your life experience through the process of bringing it to life!! 🙂  I have experienced at least a hundred “Butterfly Processes” of my own, and I thought I knew about this process BEFORE I wrote the book, I REALLY understand it now!! And I can not be more glad that I chose this path…

It’s a very new path for me- Writing and speaking- I have been a performer, singer and songwriter most of my life, and I am used to that… And, I thought that being in front of an audience bearing my soul in a different way (As an author and speaker) would be pretty simple at first.  Boy, was I ignorant! 🙂  I have learned that choosing to show up differently in front of an audience has made me REALLY clear and aware of how I would like to show up in the world!!  I have learned about being authentic, I have learned about creating the life I truly want and desire, I have learned about Abundance and lack in their truest forms, I have learned about who my audience is, I have learned about who I am, and I have learned who my true family is.

I guess, what I would like to say, with this- my first Blog on my brand new site- is this: No matter WHAT you think you want to do, no matter how much you think it will change you or not change you, no matter what you think you know about the new thing you are manifesting and creating into your life, YOU must come first.  YOUR CALLING is what matters in this world, and we (the world) NEED you to do your thing!

That is my motivation, and I’m grateful to be able to share this process, my new book, and my new path with you!!

Blessings and Peace!!

Terra Bundance

25 07, 2013

This is Terra’s new website!

By |July 25th, 2013|News|

This will be the home of Terra Bundance on the web. This is a sample news story.

25 07, 2013

Welcome to Terra Out Loud!

By |July 25th, 2013|Terra Out Loud|


Welcome to Terra Out Loud, the best place to get great info directly from Terra. She will be posting lots of great stuff here, I hope you enjoy it :]